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Osama's Puppet Boy

James Kent

Osama pulls the strings and George Bush Dances. Too bad we pay the price.

Wherever he is, Osama bin Laden must be laughing his ass off. No matter how remotely he may have hidden himself, word of the American's foolishness must have reached him by now. I can envision the scene in my head, a courier on a motorcycle burns down a pocked and dusty road, comes to a stop at a camouflaged hideout, runs quickly inside and bows before his master's feet. "Oh great one," he says to his sworn leader Osama. "The American's have done it. I have seen it on Al-Jazeera myself. They have finally passed the Homeland Security Bill!"

Osama laughs wickedly, harder even then when the World Trade towers fell, his evil cackles echoing throughout the cracked and rock-strewn landscape.

Just why is Osama tickled? Because this is exactly what he wanted all along. The terror attacks themselves were just a prod, a flaming stick thrown on the anthill to get the ants running scared, too frightened and confused to realize they were trampling over and destroying the very things they hold most dear. And our queen ant, the mighty George W. Bush, may be the most confused and frightened of them all.

In all fairness it is hard to blame Georgie boy for being scared. This war against terror isn't what he signed up for when he decided it would be fun to become president. He didn't have the heroic war stories or steely intelligence background of his father, instead he was a white-gloved softy raised in cushy prep schools and hard-drinking frat clubs, dodging military experience any way he could and jumping like a privileged dilettante from one leather executive swivel chair to another. He figured running the country would be easy as long as Dad's old chums were around to help him, but that's where he guessed wrong. While sleepwalking through his term as Commander in Chief all hell broke loose. The shit hit the fan on his watch, and now he'll be damned if he takes one on the chin without scrabbling back with all the screeching, nail-gouging, hair-pulling ferocity he can muster.

It's not his fault that he's not up to the task of taking on the specter of terror himself, but it is his fault that he's surrounded himself with the most ruthlessly hawkish and self-serving advisors he could find. Who could blame him for thinking that the Patriot Act and the Homeland Security Bill were good things for the country? They'll help us catch terrorists, right? At least that's what he was told, and that's what he has told us over and over again. And some of us even believe it, our congress has certainly rolled over and accepted his word as truth. But Osama knows better.

Osama knows that in his craven, lily-livered, white-knuckled fear, George W. Bush has single-handedly lead our great nation into the dismantling of our own constitution. It seems strange that an act of terrorism committed by a gang of well-funded desert thugs could bring an end to over two centuries of freedoms in our country, but that's exactly what Osama has done. He pulled it off masterfully, and Georgie Boy danced like a puppet on Osama's string, pulling the whole country along into his misguided crusade to make us all safe again.

What Osama knows full well, a fact that George W. Bush and his kind seemed to have missed, is this: Neither the Patriot act nor the Homeland Security bill will do a single thing to stop terrorism on our soil. Terrorists are by nature experts at espionage, masters of obscuring their identities, clouding their money trails, and sneaking themselves into situations where they can do any kind of damage. When policing agencies figure out how to track their movements or monitor their communications they just find new ways to hide themselves and new methods to obscure their intentions. Despite all the huff and chest-pounding over the "anti-terrorist" powers granted by our shiny new police state legislation, the only people who are going to be under more scrutiny are you and I, the hapless citizens of the United States who have just allowed our most cherished privacies to be stripped away.

Terrorists do not subscribe to magazines or make credit card purchases at the mall, nor do they care who is tapping their phones or monitoring their web browsing or why. When one of their members falls a new one rises to take their place. When one of their cells is disrupted the others become even more vigilant about succeeding in their tasks. In contrast, when our freedoms our taken away we do nothing. We sit and stare in disbelief, trying to convince ourselves that "Total Information Awareness" is not such a bad thing, even as the guys on the nightly news casually toss around terms like "Police State" and "Big Brother." The glorious information age has finally delivered us into the most sophisticated surveillance lock-down we could have ever imaged, and it's all thanks to a puppet-master named Osama.

So rock on Georgie Boy, you're playing right into Osama's hands. Good job. When Osama said America would fall he never said how it would fall, but he was right. We're falling right now, right on our own sword.

Tags : psychedelic
Rating : Teen - Drugs
Posted on: 2002-11-25 00:00:00